![]() Any trips outside are basically survival exercises anyway, where I’m like a Navy SEAL commander shouting “GO! GO! GO!” to the kids as we hunker down and dash from one shaded area to the next, so it’s not like I spend a lot of time just sitting around outdoors. When it is 105 degrees outside without a single cloud in the sky, my misery level is already so astronomically high that the increase in suck from wearing jeans and a heavier shirt instead of something lighter is negligible. But when it gets to the point of being STUPID HOT, it doesn’t matter anymore. When it’s just “really hot” I try to wear light capri pants, shorts, and t-shirts with breathable material. On the plus side, I’ve been able to use more of my wardrobe. This is what our forecast has looked like all summer. It cracks me up to imagine the reaction if something like that were to run around here. Maybe it’s because I live in Austin, where pets are valued as much (okay, more) than people, but the “not everyone likes your bad dog” message makes me snicker every time I think of it. I keep laughing about this old public service announcement I stumbled across on Youtube: But it sure does make it easy! Someone please let me know as soon as this is out in the U.S. I know, I know: We don’t need this monitor, since you could get the same results by tracking your own symptoms. Seriously, FDA? Why are you trying to mess with us? I mean, what is there to review? Can someone hurt themselves from knowing their basal body temperature? (And presumably if it’s that good at helping people have children, it would also be good for spacing them as well.) But here’s the catch: You can’t buy it in the U.S. Well, this is exciting news: A company claims that they have a fertility monitor that has the same success rate as a round of IVF in terms of helping couples achieve pregnancy. This is so delicious, I could eat it for every meal. When people said, “This is great!”, I thought they meant, “This is great…compared to the scrambled fat-free egg substitutes I had for breakfast!” Not only did all the raw veggies not sound super appetizing, but, as a person who considers Ranch dressing the fifth food group, oil and vinegar sounded like some kind of punishment. Now, here’s the thing: I’ve heard of salad recipes like this before, and assumed that this was some second-class food that people on diets ate because they had no other options. That’s it! It is so good, I can’t even describe it. Top it with oil and vinegar dressing, which you make by just mixing olive oil and balsamic vinegar in a 3:1 ratio. Add feta cheese, mushrooms, avocado, cucumber, tomato, chopped black olives, and any other veggies you like (except onions, because raw onions are horrible, and putting them in salads is just wrong). Throw a bag of mixed greens in a big bowl. ![]() Nay, it is one of the best foods I’ve ever had. “Oh, no! Salad talk!” you say, “I’m going to skip this stupid and boring take!” Do so at your own peril, because this is no ordinary salad. I need to tell you about this salad I’ve been making.
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